What is shame?
Shame occurs when we feel inadequate, flawed, unworthy, and/or negatively judged by (or less than) others. It is a negative self-conscious emotion, meaning it arises from a self-evaluation.
In other words, shame is related to the ways we see, feel, and know ourselves.
Shame is a normal, evolved emotion that plays an important role in a functioning society; we need the capacity to feel shame. However, it can be a painful and distressing emotion, and it drives behaviors that can negatively affect physical and psychological well-being, relationships, learning, productivity, and growth.
In other words, shame is related to the ways we see, feel, and know ourselves.
Shame is a normal, evolved emotion that plays an important role in a functioning society; we need the capacity to feel shame. However, it can be a painful and distressing emotion, and it drives behaviors that can negatively affect physical and psychological well-being, relationships, learning, productivity, and growth.
About us
Why do we work with shame?
Shame is the 'master emotion.'
Shame evolved for a reason: we need it in a functioning society, and it regulates our social behaviors in meaningful ways. Shame is an emotion to be engaged with, not avoided or denied.
Shame can be destructive.
Despite its prosocial potential, shame can fuel intrapersonal distress, impair relationships, undermine psychological safety, and reinforce inequity. These tendencies create significant challenges within organizations, especially when shame is wielded as a tool to reinforce hierarchies, exert power, or control others.
Shame can be hidden behind challenging behaviors.
Shame is painful and itself taboo. Accordingly, people engage in behaviors to avoid or repress it, including withdrawing, blaming, attacking, and self-harm. These behaviors may drive intrapersonal distress, interfere with relationships, and provoke defensive responses from others.
Shame is a distributed emotion.
Shame is a uniquely individualized emotion: no two people will experience it in the same way. However, its presence and effects are found throughout an organization: in relationships, in teams, in the culture, and in the practices, policies, and material conditions that form its structure.
Its presence must be addressed at each of these levels.
Its presence must be addressed at each of these levels.
About us
How do we work with shame?
Shame is a challenging, taboo emotion. Its highly stigmatized nature keeps it hidden and rarely talked about, and this is one of the biggest barriers for healthy shame engagement.
When we work with shame, we try to normalize the experience. We don't talk around it, and we don't try to avoid it.
Instead, we name it, engage with it, and open space to acknowledge and talk about it. Whether we're delivering training, conducting research, or consulting with organizations, we approach shame very intentionally.
When we work with shame, we try to normalize the experience. We don't talk around it, and we don't try to avoid it.
Instead, we name it, engage with it, and open space to acknowledge and talk about it. Whether we're delivering training, conducting research, or consulting with organizations, we approach shame very intentionally.
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We bring our own lived experience
Our own shame experiences drew us to this work, and they help us connect to the experiences of the people with whom we work.
We leverage the power of story
Stories are a powerful tool for understanding our experiences, each other, and our surrounding world. This is especially true with our shame stories.
We acknowledge diverse experiences
Shame is a personal, contextual & sociopolitical emotion; no two people experience it the same. We approach our work with curiosity & open minds.
We work with creative partners
Art harnesses the complex, multi-dimensional nature of shame, prompting reflection, conversation, and healing. Art is everywhere in our work.
We are evidence-based
As academic scholars, we integrate--and strongly believe in--knowledge generated from research, including our own. Story + science is central to our work.
We approach shame through
psychological safety | authenticity | connection | acceptance | shared humanity.